What To Do When Your Relationship Is On Different Schedules


It’s hard to make it work when you and your partner are on two different time schedules, whether it’s because of a demanding job at the law office or unpredictable shifts. If you find yourself struggling to keep the flame alive because you barely see each other, read on for some tips to turn it around.


Photo: Tetra Pak/Creative Commons

Make the moments count
The time you do get to spend together shouldn’t be wasted sitting in front of the television set (and we’re pretty sure she’s still not going to bite on your attempts to debate how top-heavy the draft is with her). Make these moments worthwhile by doing fun things that bring you closer together and, more importantly, opening up your thoughts and feelings for discussion. The more brass-tacks topics, such as bills or dishes, can wait.


Photo: Frank Kovalchek/Creative Commons

Create memories
Express your feelings for her in ways that will leave a lasting impression that she can carry with her the rest of the day. Get up extra early not to just make her breakfast, but breakfast in bed. Do something funny and unexpected just before you say good bye for the day, complete with a cheesy line from an old movie. Remind her why you two are in love.


Photo: lilivanilil/Creative Commons

The small things
You can still be smooth when you’re not physically there. Find ways to make her smile by leaving notes around, or doing her half of the chores if she didn’t have time to complete them. In the end, if she’s happy, you’ll be happy.


Photo: Elliot Bennett/Creative Commons

Check your timing
If your schedules oppose for reasons other than work, it might be an illusion—there’s always room for improvement. For example, you might head to the local court on Sundays while she heads to the gym. Although she might not be as into shooting hoops with the boys, find something that both of you can do together instead, such as running, hitting the weights, or something a little more private.


Photo: Waldo Jaquith/Creative Commons

Get a professional
No, not relationship counselling. If you don’t mind spending a little scratch, the beauty of the internet is that you can find people to do practically anything for you. This includes sending a floral pick-me-up to her office when you know she has a tough presentation, getting a baby sitter to create some free time (there’s an app for that), or simply grabbing a cab to make that lunch date a possibility before your break’s over.


Photo: Mike Baird/Creative Commons

Think (way) ahead
If all else fails, there’s always Paris. Plan a vacation well ahead of time, mark it on your calendars, get time off work and get excited for some quality time together. If travel abroad is a little out of your budget, even a nearby destination can work as long as you get to be together.


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