What are you worried about?
Jealousy can go away if you identify its root cause. If you’re jealous of her talking to other men, you might be feeling a little insecure. If you call her all the time, it might be because you would like more attention yourself. If you get upset when she doesn’t show you public displays of affection, you might be worried about how your relationship looks to others. After meditating on it, take responsibility for yourself and make an effort to change things for the better.
Men are socially conditioned to keep their feelings in. Unfortunately, in the case of jealousy, keeping those feelings restrained lets our imaginations run wild, trapping us in a stressful cycle of mistrust. It helps if you bring up your jealousy with partner in a neutral way, free of accusations. Simply state what is making you feel jealous and believe her when she reassures you that nothing’s going on. If it’s not something that’s just in your head—like her clearly flirting with other guys in front of you—you do have the right to demand an end to behaviour that undermines your trust.
Jealousy cuts both ways
Think about how much it would suck if she called you at all hours, harangued you about who you’ve been hanging out with and forbade you from talking with your close female friends. This kind of behaviour would eventually make you resent her, too. If you’re treating her like this, thinking about it from her perspective should be enough of a reality check to make you stop.
Forget your ex
Sure, it may seem like your current relationship is the only one worth looking at if you’re turning into a wreck, but if you’ve recently been cheated on or dumped, hanging on to your ex could be fueling your jealousy. Leave the past in the past, and realize that your current girl is a completely different person from the one that hurt you.
Hang out with her friends
We tend to act differently when we’re surrounded by different groups of people, and that may scare you. Alleviate any stress you may have by taking initiative to hang out with her and her friends to see a side of her that doesn’t always include you. That way, you can see for yourself that girls’ night with her crazy college buddies isn’t what you thought it was, and that guy she’s “just friends” with (and may or may not have the hots for her) might actually be a pretty cool dude if he weren’t a bandwagoning Miami Heat fan.
Jealousy is rarely the result of your partner’s actions—it’s often a reflection of your own insecurities. If you’re having trouble believing in yourself, remember one thing: she’s leaving with you. No matter how many guys she harmlessly talks to, no matter how much you let your imagination run away from you—at the end of the night, unless she’s leaving with someone else, you have nothing to worry about.